A River Girl
Rivers are my favorite body of water.
I know oceans are majestic and peaceful all at once and lakes are a staple of Summer fun but I love rivers.
I first uttered my love for rivers while crossing over the Merrimack River in Manchester, NH. My reason was that “rivers take you places.” I know, oceans technically take you places but rivers connect oceans to inland areas, look at the Mississippi River, it goes from Minnesota all the way to the Gulf of Mexico in Louisiana. Rivers also connect to other rivers and from there you can reach more places. Rivers can be peaceful and still or they can have raging rapids. Rivers are also moving, constantly. Even quiet rivers have slow-moving currents. Rivers are new and changing. They are staples of cities, countries, and continents but they aren’t stagnant.
Recently I was in Southern, PA and my friend brought me to the Susequehanna River. It wasn’t intentional - he didn’t remember that rivers were my favorite body of water. But it was beautiful and I was reminded of my love for rivers.
When I was at Summer camp my favorite day of the week was when we went river walking and had a picnic upstream by the waterfall. When I was in Christchurch I loved walking along the Avon river through Hagley Park but I really loved going north of town and spending time around the Waimakariri River. In college, I ran along Hinkson Creek which isn’t technically a river but it does connect to the Missouri River if you follow it far enough. But by far my favorite river is the Spree in Berlin, Germany. I’ve spent many evenings getting drinks by the Spree and talking about life and God and His goodness with my German friends. I wasn’t really thinking about these things while I was appreciating the Susquehanna views - I was too burdened by this weight I was carrying and simultaneously overwhelmed by the beauty of the river but I realized that I’m a river girl. I know people who go to the ocean to communicate with God but that’s not me; I like talking to God by rivers.
Last year I was sitting by the River Cherwell in Oxford, England talking to God about my wanderlust and what He might have for me. I spoke to Him about loss and grief. I had no idea the worst and best were about to come. 2017 was a ride. 2018 has been full of change and growth and learning to trust God. It’s not over and I’ve not accomplished nearly what I anticipated I would but I do feel like I’m learning to surrender myself to the currents of God’s leading and trust Him to take me the way He wants to lead me.
See that evening in July by the Susquehanna (which btw is a super fun word to say) I was tired, in pain and carrying a weight of responsibility I didn’t need to carry. I was avoiding help. I was worrying. But in those maybe twenty minutes by the river I felt like I could put down my pack and rest. I could come sit by the streams and dip my feet into God’s rest and peace.
It’s been a few weeks since my last post on rest and plot twist - I’m not ANY better at resting. But I think part of the issue was - I was trying to rest like everyone. Sitting at home wasn’t helpful. Going to coffee shops doesn’t help. Even reading for pleasure doesn’t ever really help me feel fully rested.
Rivers though. Rivers help me rest.
Now I can’t always go to a physical river - although that’s a lie because the Salmon Falls River runs through my town and the Cocheco is nearby - so really I could. BUT even if I don’t - that same rest and peace I feel at rivers is available wherever I am.
“On the last and greatest day of the festival, Jesus stood and said in a loud voice, “Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them.” By this he meant the Spirit, whom those who believed in him were later to receive. Up to that time the Spirit had not been given, since Jesus had not yet been glorified.”
John 7:37-39
Often the Holy Spirit is visualized by flames of fire (thanks, Pentecost!) but I think it’s helpful for me to visualize rivers of water. I think I need to see myself in a clear, crisp, slowly moving river. I think that’s my rest. To submit to Him and let His Spirit wash over and fill me.
And then once I’m rested - I’m ready for the river to pick up. I’m ready for raging rapids and whatever life has to throw at me because I know who is Lord over the river.
So my challenge for myself and for you is to find your “river” and go there.
Whatever resting in God looks like to you - where it’s peaceful and you can hear Him above the noise of life - find that place and visit it often. It’s cheesy but it doesn’t have to be a physical visit. When I’m feeling completely overwhelmed and just absolutely ugh - I picture myself going to this beautiful river, taking my shoes off and walking into the water with no fear. I stay in that place and ask God to speak to me. I ask Him to cleanse me from all the dirt and grime that’s accumulated. I ask Him to take my burdens and wash them away.
When I think about highlights of my summer, I think about the Susquehanna. Not because it was especially exciting - the company and topic of conversation was pretty typical (although appreciated and enjoyed) - instead I think about the Susquehanna because of the rest it brought. I think about the Susquehanna because it reminded me that I’m a river girl and I belong by the river.