Legacies of Bravery

Today was grandmother’s funeral. The opening paragraph of her obituary describes her as, “an inspiring independent woman”. Listening to my aunt’s eulogy further cemented this legacy.

I come from a line of independent and brave women.

My grandmother was one. My mom is one. I am becoming one.

Both my grandmother and my mom were left abruptly by the men that had promised forever and instead of crumbling under the pressures of raising multiple children as single mothers, they rose to the occasion. They weren’t perfect, no parents are, but given their circumstances – they did their best.

My mom and grandmother still pursued education and career all while taking care of their children. They worked hard and were generous. Both took non-family members in and treated them as one of their own.

I come from a line of independent and brave women.

My grandmother was one. My mom is one. I am becoming one.

I’m not sure where I land on the nature vs. nurture debate but I can tell you – I am thankful for my heritage. I am thankful that strong Scottish roots run through my DNA. I am thankful for a mom and grandmother that gave me examples of perseverance even in the darkest times. Those examples have helped me through my own battles and will continue to help me.

I come from a line of independent and brave women.

My grandmother was one. My mom is one. I am becoming one.

Growing up I was always conflicted about the way I was. The Bible tells women to be meek and quiet and that’s never been a way I’ve described myself. Timid, shy, antisocial, awkward, weird, etc. but never meek and quiet – especially not now and not when it comes to my relationship with God.

I was convinced there was something wrong with me. Sometimes I still am. I’m not a “good Christian girl” and I’ll probably never be one. I’m not the girl who’s quiet and always serves behind the scenes who’s naturally beautiful and intelligent and really is going to make a great wife. And I’m not the bubbly, friendly, magnetic girl who draws the attention of everyone she meets, lives an incredibly amazing and adventurous life and has Instagram fully figured out.

No, I’m a little lion and I roar.  Because,

I come from a line of independent and brave women.

My grandmother was one. My mom is one. I am becoming one.

Event though sometimes I worry that I don’t fit the mold and that my little lion ways are going to hinder my life – (because let’s be real, guys don’t want to marry the girl that constantly challenges them to grow – they want to marry the sweet, pretty girl that can make a mean casserole or the gorgeous one that has good captions) – it’s okay, because really, I don’t need them.

All I need in this life to succeed – is God, because I exist to glorify Him and Him alone. And He put me in this family and gave me the grandmother and mother that I have to help form me into the woman He’s creating and calling me to be.

And that woman is independent – not of God’s call or the community He’s placed her in – but independent of societies arbitrary standards and constant comparisons. She’s independent of the need for a guy because she has all she needs in Christ.

And that woman is brave – brave enough to be different and brave enough to challenge the ones she loves (constantly – she should maybe learn some grace) and brave enough to face any circumstance firmly resting in the arms of God. She’s learning to be brave enough to give up control. She’s learning to  brave enough to be kind even when she doesn’t want to be. And mostly, she’s learning to be brave enough to joyfully walk in the path God has intended for her.

I come from a line of independent and brave women.

My grandmother was one. My mom is one. I am one.