Refiner's Fire

Recently I went to a worship evening/evangelism meeting. The music was great - there are few things I love more than singing songs to my Savior and King even though I’m not a good singer. We sang some classics and some good new ones (Tremble anyone?) but we also sang a song that the people putting the event on had written. The premise of the song was fantastic - Jesus Changes Everything. Because He does. There were however, a couple of lines that got me thinking. The most important being:

Love has found me, and he has a name
Jesus Christ, King of Kings
He has rewritten all of my past
Took my pain and made me new

In a stanza like that it’s almost unnoticeable but when you break it down, it’s clear: “He has rewritten all of my past.” I can’t stop thinking about that line. Especially in light of the last year.

Last year I went through a course and faced my past head-on. I worked through challenges. I cried a lot. I prayed a lot. Ultimately, I realized that even the broken and dark parts of my past have made me who I am. I cannot change or pray away the realities of abuse, divorce, or any of the bad decisions I’ve made. What I can do, is embrace them and dive deeper into the peace and grace that Jesus won for me on the cross.

So when I sing a song that tells me that Christ rewrites my past - I’m upset because He didn’t. If He did, then it would have all been for naught. No, He redeems them. He takes my brokenness and my pain and He turns into His glory. I’ve always viewed my life like a Japanese kintsugi vase. Kitsugi is where they fix broken pottery by filling the cracks with gold.

As my life continues things crack and pain comes because sin is in the world. But God redeems the brokenness and replaces is it with gold. And I think at the end of my life - I want my vase to be primarily gold as I allow God to continue to redeem my past and my life. Isaiah 48:10 says, “Behold, I have refined you, but not as silver; I have tried you in the furnace of affliction.” As crappy as they are, our afflictions refine us. They draw us closer to Christ. That’s why James tells us to consider trials “all joy.” Trials produce perseverance and perseverance brings maturity so we won’t lack anything.

God doesn’t rewrite our pasts - He redeems them. And if we take the chorus of the song, “Jesus, changes everything.” We realize that not only does God redeem our past but through Christ, our perspectives towards trials change. They aren’t fun. I understand. They hurt beyond understanding. There are times when the pain really is unbearable. But Jesus does change everything and we’re called to praise Him even in the pain. We’re called to view our trials as joy.

We can’t do that on our own. We can’t do that with our human perspectives - but we can with Christ. We can do the hard work to work through the pain with help from the Holy Spirit and the communities God has put us in. God has called us to live in freedom. That freedom doesn’t come from the belief that our pasts are rewritten. The freedom comes from the knowledge that God uses all things together for His good. (Romans 8:28) and that one day we will live in total freedom and redemption with Him. Until that happy day, we can share our stories which include pain and sorrow and share how God in His kindness and goodness turned ashes into beauty.