For the past two weeks, I’ve had something written and ready to share but ultimately decided against it. It’s not that I didn’t believe what I was writing or even that it was inherently wrong. It just wasn’t the right thing to share or the right time or the right place. 

And then last night I had a nightmare. And in that nightmare I was being choked. It was so real that my body physically felt that pressure and my throat is sore in that same spot today. It was absolutely frightening. But it got me thinking. Am I stifling myself? 

You see, one of the things that happened to me in 2020 was an onslaught of lies being spoken over me. I was told I was a bully capable of controlling an entire family of adults. I was told I wasn’t good enough and that other people were better qualified for roles I thought I wanted. I was told I was aggressive and unkind. I was implicitly told that I wasn’t worth people’s time or effort. I was told that believing what I believe whether politically or theologically meant I was on the side of Satan. I was told that peoples lives would be better without me in it and that Adrian should marry someone else. But probably the most damaging lies of all were the ones I told myself. Things like my voice not mattering or that all previous lies weren’t lies but truth. So I shut down. I retreated into my shell. I protected myself from most people. I used COVID as an excuse to hide from people, in some ways myself, and definitely from truth.

But God’s good. Obviously. And even in the midst of hiding and the mess that 2020 was, He whispered truth. Whether in my Bible studies, personal reading, books, prayer time or through Adrian, God was faithful. And things are changing in my heart and in my mind. And this little lion is learning how to roar again. Not in vain or in selfish pursuit. No, she’s learning to be a meek lion that only roars for her mighty God. And today she has a little roar to share. 

There are people today who feel like their dystopia is beginning and there are people who feel like their dystopia just ended and a slew of people somewhere else along this spectrum. If you are a follower of Jesus, can I just remind you that feelings are just that. They aren’t inherent truth nor are they false, they are just simply how you feel. And regardless how we feel, let’s treat people as fellow image-bearers of Christ. Let’s honor and respect them, regardless of what they may believe politically or if their eschatology differs from ours. Let’s honor and respect even those who have hurt us and harmed us and called us names. Why? Because that’s the example set for us by Jesus. It’s hard, I know. It comes at a great cost but that’s true love. That’s agape. 

If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

1 Corinthians 13

Friends, let us persevere in love for one another, especially when it’s hard. The enemy wants us divided and he’s done a fantastic job, if you ask me. But we can change that. We can say not today, Satan. We can humbly come to one another and repent, forgive, and love. We can persevere. 

Agape love saved the world thousands of years ago and it still has that same power today.