It's ridiculously cold for June 5 so I'm a living cliché and I'm wrapped up in a blanket, drinking tea, and writing. I'm missing a fireplace and a kitten curled up on my lap - but I think you catch my drift. I'm also actively procrastinating from what I probably should be doing - which is working on my homework for a theology class I'm enrolled in. We have a paper due tomorrow. But when inspiration (read: procrastination) strikes - you don't ignore it!

God's been teaching me a lot recently. Okay - honestly He's probably teaching me the same as usual but I'm finally listening so it feels like a lot. 

A year ago, last Saturday was the one year anniversary of the passing of my dog Paco. I'll share about Paco sometime. I wrote some pretty depressing but helpful stuff when he died - but that's besides the point. When Paco died I was devastated for a lot of reasons but mostly it was because he was the primary way I received God's love. Without Paco in my life - I was so worried I wouldn't know what love felt like. Maybe, that sounds ridiculous to you. I can respect that. But it was a genuine fear. For the first few months - I really struggled. And then I got a sweet new puppy, went through some personal changes, started an intense counseling program, and then went through even more changes (like buying a house!), and all of a sudden I realized it'd been a year. 

I think in the moment - it's hard to see blessings, at least for me. I get so caught up in what was, what could have been, what's hard, etc. that I rarely see the amazing things God is actually doing. 

This past Sunday, someone from my church brought a word about God's faithfulness and asked for people to share. I didn't share because I knew I would sob and I had to give the announcements. But don't worry - I'm sharing now. 

See on the anniversary of Paco's death I got coffee with one of my best friends. The purpose of coffee wasn't me or Paco or any of that. It was two friends, getting together to share life with one another. We talked about a lot of different things but afterwards I was reminded of God's faithfulness in my life. 

This past year God has gifted me incredible friends who have lavished His love on me in ways I could have never imagined. And for a large part of the year I either resented them or feared them.

I resented them because they weren't the friends I wanted them to be. 
I feared them because I was worried they would just leave me or reject me. 

But because God is good - He gave me friends who are patient, kind, loving, encouraging, and far too loyal. Friends that stick by my side even when I'm the worst or don't appreciate them. 

Looking back on this past year - yes it was categorized by loss but ultimately I think I learned more about God's love than I ever have. I've seen more of the immeasurable length, width, height and depth of His love. (Ephesians 3:19). God has used the people in my life to love me in ways Paco never could. He's also blessed me abundantly in big and little ways - ways I could have never imagined or dreamt up. 

• He's provided an amazing house that I get to call my own AND share with incredible roommates. 
• He's blessed me with a ridiculous puppy who is probably smarter than I am.
• He's put me in service opportunities that actually bring me joy and life. I feel like I can finally serve Him and thrive. 
• He's spoken to me in HUGE ways and given me the courage to actually pursue the crazy dreams He's placed in me. 
• He's redeeming my broken and painful past - it's hard but I know it's worth it. 
• He's pruning away what doesn't need to be in my life and doing it so gently. 
• He's brought actual adventure to my life - like visiting the West Coast and soon Mexico! 
• He's also placed me in an incredible community that challenges me, loves me, and brings pure joy to my life. 
• As mentioned above - He's given me amazing friends that make me laugh and ultimately point me to Christ. 

The list honestly could go on and on, because God is ridiculously faithful; it's just who He is. 

So let's live in the goodness of His faithfulness. Let's thank Him for his abundant blessings in our lives - big and small. Because honestly, if we just stop and look back at the past year or even three weeks - I promise you we can see God's love and mercy all over our lives. 

If you have any stories of God's faithfulness in your life - big or small, recent or old - send me a message! I'd love to hear about it and potentially share it. I think faith is built when we hear about God's goodness and glory demonstrated in the lives of others. So let's be a community that shares with one another and builds each other up. 

We need faith while we wait for what is to come.